“Clients already have the resources they need to explore and resolve their issues.” Carl Rogers
The second part of that quote is “given a healthy environment.” That’s the purpose of this blog: to create a healthy environment to explore and resolve your own issues. As you have read in previous posts behavior change begins with a change in beliefs.
We all need to be willing to explore our belief system as well as be willing to say goodbye and let go of “Old You” limiting beliefs that may have been causing you behavior, relationship and career opportunities your whole life.
You have the strengths and resources inside you already to change some of these beliefs as well as the feelings and emotions that go with them. Would you watch a movie you did not like again and again? If there is a song on the radio that you absolutely do not like do you continue to listen to it to the end? No!
You turn off the radio, change the station or whatever to change the state it put you in. Yuck! I hate that song. It makes me feel sad! So turn it off. If you like the song you probably turn it up or hit replay if you can.
The same with a T.V. program. If you don’t like what you are seeing, change the program. Flip the Script.
We can do the same things to change what we believe, what we think, how we feel and our outcomes. Consider this: you experience the world in pictures if you have sight. How we choose to view that picture is another difference that makes the difference. Something as simple as distance can change how you feel about anything.
If you see or feel it right in your face it is probably more sensitive than if you view it – over there – 20 feet away.
Let’s try something. Make a picture of something that is mildly upsetting for you. Something that is a five on a scale of 1-10 where 10 is really powerful (good or bad). One is pretty much nothing at all.
Maybe something that happened with your significant other. Maybe with a co-worker or boss. Let’s say it was your mother. She scolded or belittled you for something.
Make a picture or hologram of her scolding you. Put in right in front of you. Right in your face. She’s scolding, yelling and accusing you of something. On a 1-10 scale how bad does it feel? Now, move it slowly away from you a couple of feet at a time to where the picture is 20 feet away. Slowly, slowly, it’s getting smaller and more quiet…now, how does it feel? Maybe you need to move it farther away. Does it feel the same, better or worse?
Interesting isn’t it? Now let’s try it the other way.
Make a picture of your mother about 10-15 feet away from you. This time she is praising you, saying how good you are and how much she loves you. On a scale of 1-10 how does that feel?
Now move it slowly closer, and closer as the picture seems to light up. It’s a little warmer, bigger and brighter. And you have a loving hug. How does that feel? The same, better or worse? Interesting isn’t it?
You already have all the resources you need to explore and resolve your issues given a healthy environment. More on this topic as we continue. Come on back.